I'm making cupcakes for tomorrow's non-birthday party (pretty sure I'll have extra to take to work on Monday. Who can eat 48 cupcakes?) and remembering what I was doing 2 years ago. I was celebrating my release from the hospital by laying on the couch and being afraid to pee (because I knew I was still bleeding and didn't want to see it). Little did I know the very next day I would be sent right back to the damn hospital. Only I wouldn't be coming home alone.
SkyWalker has changed my life in so many ways. He's made me a better person. He's made me happier (which is pretty frickin' sad because I don't think anyone would consider me happy...). He's my reason. My reason for everything.
At least I won't be spending this weekend bleeding to death. Well, actually I might be, but 2 years ago I really thought I was bleeding to death. After the delivery when the blood just wouldn't stop I was honestly afraid to go to sleep because I thought if I did I wouldn't wake up, and if I could make myself stay awake then I wouldn't die.
I'm totally serious.
I'm also feeling a little nostalgic and sad over a part of my life that's ending. I'm weaning myself off a former addiction, something I should have done long ago, but for whatever reason I tried to hold on to it. I haven't cut all ties yet, but I'm pretty damn close.
And that is all I'll say about that.
