Short silly runs, big hills, sad dog

It's been 2 weeks since the Friehofer's and I have barely run. I took the week after off so I could rest my foot. It feels much better now, although it's not completely pain free. But now it's more that I am just aware of it, rather than out and out pain. When I stretch it in certain directions in hurts more. I'm pretty sure it's muscle and not a fracture. I don't think fractures go away on their own.

After the week off I started transitioning to my new Merrell Pace Gloves. It is a brutally slow process. It's pretty much like learning to run all over again. I can only run 1/4 mile or 2 minutes for the first 2 weeks. I'm in the second week of that. Last week I ran on both the treadmill and the driveway. After I got back from my Friday evening run I switched to the Pace Gloves and ran my 2 minutes on the treadmill. On Sunday when I came back I went back out with the Pace Gloves. I want to make sure that I test them on the road, but it's such a pain in the neck being limited to 2 minutes. This week I've decided to alternate runs instead of switching shoes. I did my "regular" run yesterday and then today did my Pace Glove run. But I didn't actually run in the Pace Gloves... it's recommended that you throw in some barefoot running in the first couple of weeks, regardless of whether you are transitioning to minimalist shoes or going all barefoot. Since I was doing it on the treadmill today I wore my injinji socks, no cushioning but I didn't have to worry about the 'mill getting too hot (although with only 2 minutes I don't know how much of a worry that is anyway.)

What I'm coming from

What I'm going to

My "regular" runs have been less regular too... I'm not training for anything, I don't need to get a certain number of miles or hit a particular pace, so I've done a lot of running with the Princess in the driveway, and yesterday I put Haze on the leash (and harness) and we ran around the yard. It was the most fun I've had running, but at the same time it was sad. She's not the puppy she used to be. I remember her pulling me around on the leash, but for most of the run she was doing a 12 minute pace. I told her she was slow and she did speed up to an 8:45 but she couldn't keep it up. We didn't even do a whole mile, but it was actually pretty taxing than just a mile on my own would have been. When we were done she immediately took a nap. We never really took the dogs on the leash because we have the fenced yard for them to pee in and they always ran around with each other. But without Isaac, all Haze does is lay around. She's lost weight from not eating as much. I thought she was only eating once a day, but Vader said it's been less. But after running with me yesterday, she ate her dinner last night AND ate her breakfast this morning. So I might have to do this more often with her. It's worth it to give up my regular mileage.

This sums up her activity on most days now.

Last Friday I ran the Big Hill on my road again and it just kills me. I had thought about riding Bridget's coattails and doing hill repeats, but quickly said Uh-uh. I was curious about the elevation so I uploaded my garmin data and compared the elevation graph from my road and the Freihofer's. There's a pretty big difference in the hills. See for yourself:

Elevation from the Freihofer's. There are hills but it doesn't look like any of them are more than a 40 foot difference.

My road. I did the hill twice during this run. I must have run a little bit further down the second time. In any event, there is a difference of roughly 150 feet for the first time and 180 for the second. 

I guess now I know why I kept waiting for the "big hills" at the race. Maybe if I did those hill repeats I could break 27 next year...

Freihofer's Round Two

Sure, it's a goofy smile, but it's a smile damnit!
I am most happy that I am wearing an orange bib (slower expected finish) in a sea of yellow bibs (faster expected finish)

I outlined my goals in my last post and of them the smiling thing was actually the most important to me. I had been hoping to achieve my A goal of 28 minutes but with my foot hurting the past week I thought I would be happy with anything in the 28 range... but really expecting 29 or slower. But that still beat my last year's time of 33:18.

I came in at 27:58 (chip time). It's only 2 seconds, but it's 2 seconds UNDER my A goal. I think that's a 5 minute and 20 second improvement over last year but feel free to correct my math.

I'm pretty happy.

I ran smiling most of the way. Around mile 2 my bladder rebelled and I once again felt the urge to pee (I peed 3 times before I left the house and 2 times before the race). What's odd is that I was fine for a long time and it's just been the past few weeks that mile 2 sets off the pee-urge (no, I'm not pregnant). Always mile 2. It might just be in my head now. Anyway, I ignored it and kept on trucking. My foot felt miraculously fine. I didn't even have to pretend it wasn't there. It just didn't hurt (sure I'm icing it now and it hurt like hell walking to the car, but it was totally worth it.) I've been reading lots of barefoot runner blogs and ultramarathon runner blogs and used a trick I learned from them--it's easier to run faster than slower. When I felt tired I sped up. I guess it worked. The really funny thing was that I had been anticipating really bad hills. I've been running the big hill on my road A LOT the last couple of weeks to prepare. There was the one hill when we first started running but there are SO MANY other women it's impossible to get ahead that I didn't even notice the hill. And then the rest of the way there were some gradual inclines, but I kept waiting for the hills! After running my big hill it was EASY for me! Amazing!

It was a great race all around. My Strong Running Mama friends did great! It's so nice to run a race with good friends by your side. Okay, not by my side since they all smoked me, but you get my meaning. Our fearless leader, The Happy Runner, did beyond amazing, smashing her A goal and finishing in 22:51! I can't even fathom that!!

The stats for those of you interested (i.e future me): 1036/4142 overall; 120/520 age group; splits: 9:12/8:53/8:46 (I like it when the numbers go in that direction. Kind of easy too when you're starting out with 4000 other women!)

We are the pink/black duo because pink is the new black.
Or maybe black is the new pink.

SkyWalker and the Princess ran their own races. Unfortunately they were a couple of hours after my race, but it gave us an opportunity to walk around and eat lunch and see Andy Morse for a few minutes. The Princess's race was first and she was raring to go. In fact once she got to her mark she just started going and I had to grab her back! I held the Princess's hand (her request) for her 50 meter dash. We unintentionally color-coordinated. She was so excited and happy and smiled the entire way and really had a great time. She says that next year she will run without holding my hand so that she can try to beat me.  Once again, she insisted on showering with me when we got home.

See, he's ahead. 

SkyWalker did so much better than I thought he would. He really gave it his all and ran trying to beat me. I let him. But it wasn't that hard to let him... of course I did run a lot more before and had just run with the Princess, but still I foresee the days of my children beating me coming very soon. He was smiling and laughing the whole way and enjoying himself. He had to run further than the Princess--a whole 100 meters. He did a GREAT job. And then complained about having to walk so far to the car.

Race goals & minimalist shoes

In just 4 days I will run in the Freihofer's Run for Women. For the second time.

I've been doing a lot of running lately. Not as much as I was supposed to, but a lot more than I had been. In March I ran 39.9 miles (more than the 26.8 I did in February). April was similar with 40.1 miles, but for May I have run 58.2 miles. That's more than I have run in a month ever. I'm not sure how I managed that because I feel like I skipped a lot of runs.

My time in last year's race was 33:18. So, my goals:

A. 28 minutes or faster
B. Beat 29:25 (my last 5K time)
C. Beat 33:18

The biggest goal has nothing to do with time or pace. I want to run smiling. I want to look like I'm actually enjoying myself instead of like I'm going to pass out at any second. I want to embrace the Run Smiley Collective. And I want to finally get a good picture of me running.

My new shoes (Merrell Pace Glove) will be getting here on Friday. Just in time. I will NOT be wearing them for the race since it will take a good 6-8 weeks to transition to them! Kinda crazy. But they are minimalist shoes and totally different than the cushioned Mizuno's I'm wearing now. I flirted with the idea of barefoot running, but I'm just not there yet. I also thought about the Vibram's Five Fingers, but decided against them. These shoes have the Vibram soles so I can still feel the road and get the feedback by feet need, but it's more of a traditional shoe than the VFF. I wear the Injinji toe socks so my toes get a little more individual action, just not as much as the VFF. I had to order them online so I'm hoping I got the right size. I've got a general idea of how to transition to the shoes (very slowly) but I need to sit down and come up with a weekly plan for the summer.

As much as I'm not ready for barefoot running, I think I'm going to do it down the driveway getting SkyWalker off the bus.

One day

Tomorrow it will be 4 weeks since Isaac has died. In many ways it seems like an eternity has passed, but yet I still feel like I am out there on the deck watching helplessly.

It's not easy to grieve for a dog. Or a pet. People don't expect you to do it. They don't quite get it. There are no funerals or rituals or ceremonies to help you grieve and move on. So it tends to linger.

We move through our days. Quietly. Trying not to notice the absence. Trying not to feel the emptiness.

Haze sleeps a lot. She wants to be close always. She lays under the table as we eat, not begging, just being close. I let her.

I am glad that I am home. Glad that I have filled my house with loud children for her to follow and love. If I were working I am sure I would have quit by now just to stay with her. She has always been a people-dog. I am sure that one day she will be fine. We both will. One day.

Isaac

I never realized how much a presence he had in this house. The house was always quiet when the dogs were at the kennel, but both dogs were gone. And when he had his surgeries and spent the night at the vet, it was brief and we were distracted. But now it is just so clear that he is missing. He was always under my feet. I couldn't cook, load the dishwasher, check the fridge, or do anything without him right there waiting for me to drop something. He loved the steam of the shower and would often lay down on the bathroom rug as I showered. Anytime I was in the bathroom it was the perfect opportunity for him to come and lay his head in my lap. He was just always there. I always knew where he was because I could hear him breathing and wheezing 3 rooms away. Scratching. Shaking. Licking his balls. He filled an entire house with his noise.

Haze spends most of her time laying down, watching us, wondering. The first night she eagerly ran to the door when Vader came home from work, thinking he would be bringing Isaac home. Every once in a while she walks around and just looks. I can see it in her eyes. She is very very quiet. She doesn't bark. She looks confused at feeding times and waits as long as she can before she gives in and eats.

He was only 8. I'll never know what happened. We were on the deck. One minute he was fine, the next he was laying down and dead. SkyWalker saw him lay down, heard him whining, told me and I said he was fine. He said "No, there's something wrong", and I went to him and he wasn't moving or responding. Vader tried to get his heart to start again, he tried chest compressions, tried everything we could think of. We're guessing that he had a heart attack. But we'll never know for sure. Vader took him to the vet the next morning to be cremated and he chose not to have him examined. He chose not to bring home his ashes. So we'll always have this question hanging over us. Wondering if the tapeworm he'd had the week before had done more damage than we thought before he got medicine. Wondering if something else had been going on. Wondering.

Quiet

For a long time I have told Isaac to be quiet. To stop barking. To stop shaking. To stop scratching. To just be quiet.

I will never hear his barking, or shaking, or scratching again.

It is too damn quiet.

Isaac and Haze slept every night curled up together.

Planning

I have a plan.

My plan was going to be to take it easy with everything. I stayed under 30 minutes and got my PR for my last run. I made a whopping $42 from the examiner--for 3 months of work. School is drawing to a close and my time will be even more limited. So I thought I'd just take it easy right now.

But I don't really do that. I mean, it might look like I'm taking it easy, but really I'm always juggling lots of different things and thinking about lots of different things.

My plan now is to just not sleep.

No, not really. Although that would make things easier. Thanks to the Happy Runner, I have a plan to get my 5K time down to 28 minutes for the Freihofer's in June. I ran it in 33:18 last year, so 28 would be awesome. We'll see. To really help me with my training I've come up with a way to get 2 outside runs a week instead of just 1. I always run on the road on Sundays. But now I will also be running Friday evenings. I'll feed the kids and me dinner (Fridays are always pizza--frozen--& salad. Easy peasy.), and as soon as Vader walks in the door at 6 I will walk out. Or run out. Most of my Friday runs are in the 3-4 mile range so it shouldn't take too long. Vader will eat his salad and I'll get home just in time to help get the kids in the bath. This obviously only works when it's light out at 6 because my road has no streetlights. But I'll take it. This is beyond awesome because of the planet-aligning I need to do to get Chewie to nap.

The days we stayed home last week Chewie napped great. The days we went out, she did not. All it takes is 5-10 minutes of sleeping in the car and she won't nap. Yesterday we stayed home, had lunch at 11:30, she was in her bed by 12 (without the Princess), asleep by 12:30, and then I put the Princess up there before 1, she was so quiet she got bored and fell asleep too. I paid for it at bedtime, but that was okay. Today, I managed to keep her awake when we got the Princess from preschool and I got her down  by herself shortly after 1. I brought the Princess up there at 1:30 and Chewie was sleeping on the Princess's bed. It was adorable. I'm not quite sure what happened, but she woke up and proceeded to destroy Pinkalicious: Tickled Pink. Luckily it's not a running day. So, I need to either stay home or make sure we are home before noon and Chewie doesn't fall asleep in the car and I have enough time to put Chewie down for a nap and then get the Princess up there so I can run & shower before I need to get SkyWalker off the bus. Wednesday is intervals day so it's a given I'm just going to be home now. I guess I'll have Fridays to do things.

I was going to write about my Blog Critics opportunity but someone is home from school now and two other someones are awake and destroying their room. So that'll just have to wait.