The long and the short of it is that the FIL has cancer again. Radiation seems to be the only option. I don't want to get into details here, now, but suffice it to say that our house has been filled with gloom once again and we're not exactly optimistic.
Wednesday, January 31, 2007
Tread lightly
Thursday, January 25, 2007
What's the point?
I just finished my anime movie program. With one teen. Where are the big numbers everyone promised me? I wouldn't have even done it for the one teen but when I got in the room (I left at 6:10 to canvas the area and returned at 6:15) she had already pressed play. I said "Did that start on its own?"
"No"
"Did you press play?"
"Yes"
"Well... that was pretty ballsy."
And just left it at that. And despite the fact that there was ONE teen, I am now down 4-5 cans of soda. How she went through 4-5 cans I don't really know.
I think it's safe to say that I will be cancelling my February program and not doing this again. Everything is cyclical right? We'll focus on the tween programming now, get another core group in here, and they will grow up to be teenagers.
Sunday, January 21, 2007
I should stand up more at work
And then strange men wouldn't hit on me. Seeing as how obviously huge I am getting.
Anyway, I am tired. Exhausted. I can't even begin to say how tired I am. Refer to my last post about Thursday night's sleeping fiasco. Last night was somewhat worse. Apparently while I was at work SkyWalker did NOT want to nap for Daddy. Which is a first. Daddy was not giving up though so there was crying for an hour and half, resulting in vomiting. Joy. He finally fell asleep around 3ish, which is when he should have been getting up. Vader got him up at 5. That's a bit late. I was home shortly after and we had dinner. We tried to get SkyWalker to go down at 8ish. He kept getting out of bed, crying, screaming, carrying on. Vader stayed up there for at least an hour putting him back in the bed. Finally he just left him screaming at the gate. I went up there, checked his diaper, he said he wanted to sit on the potty (total bed-avoidance tactic). I put him on the potty, he did nothing. I gave him tylenol just in case something hurt (I took the risk and stuck my finger in his mouth to see if his 2nd year molars are coming in, there is some swelling but I don't know for sure). The tylenol didn't even work. Gah. I was up with him until after 11 p.m. I rocked him, I held him, I sang to him, he was fine, no crying. I put him in his bed he immediately got up. But he was so tired I still don't know how he didn't just keel over. I managed to get him to lay down on his belly and I rubbed his back. I stopped rubbing his back and he patted his back and looked at me like "C'mon woman, keep going." He was clearly exhausted. As was I. So I did what I have never done before, in a moment of weakness, and I let him fall asleep with me holding his hand. It's as if he's forgotten how to fall asleep on his own and how to soothe himself, and what do I do? I let him fall asleep not only with me in the room, but holding my hand! Argh. But I was so tired.
At 4 a.m he woke up crying. Vader went up there, did the usual diaper check, and left. Crying continued. He cried for 10-15 minutes, stopped for 1-2 minutes, cried again for 10-15 minutes and repeated the process for nearly an hour. We didn't go up there. But I was still wide awake (and hungry!) and frustrated. Vader woke him up at 8:40 this morning. He says he's not going to put him down for a nap at all today. My suggestion was to get him down early and not let him sleep past 3:30. If he's waking up from nap at 5, he's not having a snack. And we don't have snacks after dinner (well, HE doesn't have snacks after dinner) so he might be hungry. He might also be teething. He might also be having growing pains. He might also be asserting his independence. He might also just be a normal 2 year old.
There has been a bit of daycare drama lately and lots of upheaval and his favorite teacher is not there anymore. So he could be reacting to that... but who knows? He's gone through crappy sleep periods before but this is the worst. That could just be because he's older and can scream louder though.... I don't think he's really in any kind of pain because he was totally fine as long as I put him on the potty or was holding him. He was downright cute. It was so irritating. He kept giving me little smiles and snuggles AND get this--he was rubbing noses with me! He has NEVER rubbed noses with me. Ever. As much as I tried. The only nose rubbing I get is from Haze. But last night he was rubbing noses and caressing me and hugging me and using all of his tricks. He did repeatedly say "wind" and it was windy, but even that was just an excuse. I think it was just a power struggle. And I'm not really sure who won.
Tonight had better be better. I am tired. I need my sleep. I am 5 months (22 weeks today) pregnant and I need my sleep!
Friday, January 19, 2007
My queendom for a nap
Not necessarily for me. But for a certain little jedi who is refusing to nap at all. And after such a horrible night you would think he would be wiped out. I left work "early" so I could get home, poop in peace, relax and watch the musical Scrubs. When I got home SkyWalker was up because the damn dogs had barked. Argh. I made the mistake of going up there. He kept asking to use the potty. How can I say no to that? So he actually peed on the potty 3 times! Yay, wonderful, but he just wanted to sit there. He kept saying pee and poopoo and cried when I tried to put him back to bed, but when I put him on the potty he didn't poop. Both Vader and I tried to calm him down numerous times. I finally had to leave him screaming at the gate. And he SCREAMED for at least half an hour before he finally fell asleep. I can only hope on his bed. Ugh.
He's been mostly okay today, no more potty business although we have flushed his poop down the potty a couple of times today. He washed his hands after and when I told him he was done and got the towel to dry his hands off he managed to turn the faucet back on and burn his hand. He SCREAMED again. Is it any wonder I have headaches? One of his fingers is a bit redder than the others so he must have gotten it good... but it's not blistering and I'm sure he'll be fine.
I don't know if he's picked this up at daycare or just doing it on his own, but he's been giving me this fake, showing all his teeth smile, whenever he knows he's skating on thin ice or he's just gotten me to read him yet one more book. It's funny and annoying at the same time.
Interesting observation--when I was home alone on Wednesday the dogs did not bark ONCE. They growled a couple of times but no barking. As soon as I picked up SkyWalker and he was home, the barking began. I think I have been replaced as "One to protect." Either that or they're so used to him saying "I E bark." that they think they *have* to bark. (I=Isaac and for some reason E=Haze).
He's been saying "Puzzle" and it is the cutest thing in the world. I don't know why he didn't start talking sooner when I give him a standing ovation every time he says anything! Right now he is playing with a huge box we have in the living room from one of our recent purchases. Nice to know all these toys aren't a waste of space. Argh. He's also been drawing "O"s. He wanted me to draw a bunch of circles, (he says "O") so I told him to and he actually hesitated, thought about what he was doing and drew a circle. Not perfect, but pretty damn good.
One of the three of them has either farted ("bart") or pooped because it stinks right now. I think I would notice if the dogs pooped... they have been farting really bad today so it's very possible it's not a SkyWalker poop. That would be the 3rd of the day and I'm really not in the mood for another one. I don't know how I got such a pooper when I have to struggle and work at each one...
I just ordered new contacts online (refills) and I got a cancellation notice saying when they confirmed it with the doc it wasn't the right prescription but the doc gave them the right one so they changed the order. I was confused and after scrutinizing the wrong and fixed orders I finally saw what it was. Instead of -5.0 I put -.5 for one of my eyes. Yeah, that's a difference. Oh, I cancelled that doc appt the other day because it was clear I did not have pink eye. I have hypochrondritus. I hope it goes away soon.
Why is throwing a piece of string on my lap and then pulling it away so amusing?
I may not get naptime today, but at least it's almost snack time. I need a snack damnit.
Tuesday, January 16, 2007
Gah! Goop + bloodshot eyes....
Last night before I went to bed there was a tnnnnnnnmm
m
Okay then. SkyWalker obviously got ahold of the laptop... damn barking dogs. Anyway, there was a tremendous amount of goop in my left eye before I went to bed. I woke up at 4 am and I couldn't open my eye. Sigh. Vader got me a warm wash cloth and I managed to unstick it and it was wicked red. So I called the doc this morning to see if I could get in today. Totally booked. But they have an appt at 9:15 tomorrow. Argh. Vader took me and SkyWalker to an Urgent Care place that I would never normally go to. Closed until Jan. 23. So he took us back home and went to work. I can't see very well with my glasses, not really well enough to drive, and with the red irritated eye it was just worse. Which is why Vader had to drive us. I just called the doc now to see take that 9:15 appt. tomorrow. Gone. So now I have an appt. at 2:15 p.m tomorrow. And I have to figure out if A) I can risk driving myself or make my husband take more time off from work B) Do I go in to work tomorrow morning or take more sick time? Argh. It's not like I'm a 2 year old rubbing my eyes on everyone but I don't want to expose other people. Once I get the drops and start using them then I think I can go back. I'm trying to save my damn sick time and I had to leave early yesterday for something ridiculous and now I will probably be out 2 days in a row. ARGH. Maybe a miracle will happen and I will wake up tomorrow with normal eyes. But I've never had eyes stuck together without it being pink eye.