Sigh

We had our playdate at the preschool today. Vader stayed home with the Princess so I could concentrate on SkyWalker. That had been our plan when we thought she was going to be recovering from surgery and we decided to just stick with it. Half of the class met first and then the other half met. It will be the same on Monday, so he won't see the entire class until Wednesday. There were about 10 kids there including him. I would say 9 of them were sitting at the tables, next to each other, drawing with markers or playing with playdough. Guess who wasn't? Guess who was in a corner playing with trucks by himself? When the playdate was over all the kids had to sit on the blue line on the rug. 9 of them did. Guess who didn't want to? The teacher saw and took pity and announced that parents could sit too and then he did. He refused to talk to her, refused to answer any questions. Refused to play with anyone. 

I know that it will get better. When we did our first playdate with our meetup group he hid in the bathroom. And now he asks to go to people's houses, he plays with other kids and tells me he loves them, he talks to other moms and tells me to go away. So I know that he will settle in and be comfortable. It was only a 45 minute playdate. Maybe it wasn't long enough for him to get comfortable. I know it's only a matter of time before he's making friends. 

That doesn't mean it doesn't suck watching it. I'm stuck wondering why he's like this and none of the other kids seem to be. Why he's so shy. What did I do wrong? Is it just nature? During his 8 months in the womb, did he somehow sense my inner distrust of people?

Monday will be an hour and 15 minutes with me down the hall in an orientation. The first day that he is left there by himself will be Wednesday. The very same Wednesday that my baby will be going under anesthesia and having surgery. Possibly at the same time. Yeah, that will be fun.

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