Desperation

Desperate times call for desperate measures right?

I e-mailed the local mom's club asking how to be involved. Blah blah blah. Why is this significant? Because I'm quite sure half of the people in this damn group know me from the library and have some sort of preconceived notions about how much of a stuck-up bitch I am because of former co-worker who is a part of the group. Bah.

But it gets worse.

I also joined 3 meetup groups at meetup.com. Two are parenting--one sounded great--a thirtysomething group just across the river but it's going to disappear in 3 days if no one steps up to organize and you all know that ain't me. The second one has to "approve" me first. The third one is not as local as I'd like and is not parenting but calls themselves Goddess Girls and how can I not join that?

This sucks.

I will make reach out and make the first move (like with the neighbor) but then I like to let other people take control. Plan things and I will be there. Call and invite me. E-mail and invite me. But if I'm expected to always do it then I just... don't. If I don't call the neighbor months can go by. That just sucks. Once I reach a certain level of comfort then I can start saying "hey, I'm doing this, wanna come?" I do remember back in the day having New Year's Eve parties at my house and having a semi-social life. But it takes a while.

I made three NY resolutions: a) To get up earlier in the morning instead of running up the stairs when I have to feed the Princess. b) To make a new friend(s) c) To not let myself turn into the bitter, angry, depressed person that I am becoming.

It's only the 3rd day of the new year. I've got time right?

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